It’s time for letting go

February 24, 2009 at 10:38 pm (Me Moments, Music Moments)

I was listening to this song Miracle of the Moment on my Windows Media Player and I thought about a question that Gabe both shared and blogged about recently.

If you could travel back into time, would you change anything?

My initial answer was of course! I would go back and reverse some of the foolish mistakes I’ve made. Maybe even warn the then me to avoid the pitfalls I’ve fallen into. Gabe however pointed out that those circumstances shaped me to be the person I am now. I couldn’t accept his reasoning. For me, it is better to avoid the hurts, sorrows and pains and fill them with the good memories. Who knows it might made me a better person than I am now. (This is a perfectionist’s thought :p)

Today however I had a different perspective. I took a quick tour into my past – the downs, the unhappy moments, the painful moments and for a short glimpse I saw how those memories became gems in my life… but that’s if I stop holding them too tightly in my heart. As I let them go piece by piece and placed it in God’s hand, they began to sparkle, lighting my way ahead instead of hurting me.

 

I felt somewhat liberated today… free to let go of the past follies, free to forgive, free to put less importance in what people may say or think about me, free to laugh and maybe tear a little.

Maybe I’m in the process of healing.

Maybe it’s time for letting go.

Steven Curtis Chapman
Miracle Of The Moment

It’s time for letting go
All of our “if onlies”
Cause we don’t have a time machine

And even if we did
Would we really want to use it
Would we really want to go change everything

Cause we are who and where and what we are for now
And this is the only moment we can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss the miracle of the moment

There’s only One who knows
What’s really out there waiting
And all the moments yet to be
And all we need to know
Is He’s out there waiting
To Him the future’s history

And He has given us a treasure called right now
And this is the only moment we can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss the miracle of the moment

And if it brings you tears
Then taste them as they fall
Let them soften your heart

And if it brings you laughter
Then throw your head back
And let it go
Let it go, yeah
You gotta let it go

And listen to your heartbeat

And breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss the miracle of the moment

And breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now (here and now)
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss the miracle
Of the moment

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Me and the world

February 17, 2009 at 10:47 pm (Career Moments, Friends & Family Moments, Me Moments)

I had a bit of a frustrating moment at work today, finding it difficult to fit in more so in a big group. Hence some of the posts for the day. As I went back and forth in my mind regarding my own social inadequacy, I begin to question myself: Why am I allowing other people to define who I am? Why should I be bothered about how I am viewed by other people?

An earlier conversation with Jo over dinner last Saturday also brought to mind the lessons on boundaries. Why should I be afraid of the comments or aloofness perceived from other people? Why can’t just let go of the ‘good’ image and just be myself – following my desires (as long as they are in line with God’s Word), likes or dislikes rather than cowering in fear as if they are the master and keeper of my life.

Boundaries – I am responsible for my emotions, actions and responses and not of other people.

It’s okay. I can stand because the definition of me is God – His love and grace.

If He says I’m okay, who is to argue? *Grin*

Check out the song in Gabe’s blog.

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Air mata

February 17, 2009 at 10:28 pm (Me Moments)

Air mataku menitis
Pedih rasanya hatiku
Bilakah akan terlihat senja

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Walls

February 17, 2009 at 10:20 pm (Courtship Moments, Friends & Family Moments, Me Moments)

What’s with the crowd that gives me jitters?

What’s this wall between the both of us that prevent the whispers of your heart to reach me?

Why am I afraid to reach out? For fear that I may receive the same sting that was given me a few years back?

Yet in both our holding back, we are closed in this wall of silence. Our words fall like empty bottles on the pavement – loud but meaningless.

Oh Lover of the Souls of Men, draw us past the pretense and mask. As we come face to face with You, may we have the courage to peel the layers of facades and connect on a deeper level. You alone know how our hearts yearn for that. You alone know how lonely it can be when men seem together yet still far apart.

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Falling Leaves

February 17, 2009 at 10:11 pm (Short Musings & Quotes)

Falling yellow leaves dotted the sky, how it reminds me of autumn day past.

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In the wilderness

February 14, 2009 at 12:02 am (Faith Moments)

Somehow with the stripping of all that is familiar and comfortable, I find myself strangely at peace within. It was almost as if by the removing of the noise that bombards me day and night when I was in comfort zone, I found the rest I needed for my spirit. Sometimes, I could even catch a faint whisper of Your voice, speaking of Your love and affection to me. That above all else, makes my spirit soar and my heart anchored onto something steady. Who would have known that in the wilderness seemingly barren of luxury and comfort, I would find You – You as the source of my Strength, You as the Lover of my Soul and You as the anchor of my soul.

Oh how I dismiss it at first when You asked me to move.

“You must be joking. Move? Now? Why now? When all seem settled, fun and familiar.”

In Your wisdom, You knew. You knew that it will be good. You knew that it is in places like this that I will once again learn to cling on You just as a child clings on to the father.

Thank you for this journey.

Let’s walk.

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Home

February 11, 2009 at 11:02 pm (Short Musings & Quotes)

It is the people that makes a home.

Having Gabe and my sister over in Singapore the past few days was a beautiful blessing. Somehow it lessen the foreign and lonesome feeling I felt for the first 2 weeks and made the place a pleasing one because I had memories to keep. Maybe it’s just not people alone that makes a home.

Maybe it is the memories that you share with people that makes a place beautiful and comfortable.

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We will dance

February 5, 2009 at 10:45 pm (Courtship Moments, Music Moments)

When you first held my hand and we walked, we were such a clumsy couple. Sometimes you would step on my toes and other times I would trip over you. Our moves were comical to outsiders. To us however, the efforts seem daunting. We expected to glide over the sidewalks just as skaters dance on ice yet it is a challenge to even walk a few steps without tripping over each other.

There were tears.
There were frustrations.
There were many sorry and forgive me.
And there were many…

Let’s try this together again.

So we picked up where we left.

We talked.
We communicated.
We turn aside from our interest.
We chose to look at what’s best for the other person.

We learned to laugh
… at our mistakes
… at our tripping over each other

Slowly we learn to trust, to value our vulnerability as we unveil our hearts to each other.

We are not the same.
Our steps when started were not aligned.
However as the music begins to play a lot more longer, we learned to dance together.
You the lead and me the follower.

Slowly my head begins to rest upon your shoulders.
Your grip relaxes and soften.
We begin to dance…really dance as one.

Dear love, let’s dance.

I’ve watched the sunrise in your eyes
And I’ve seen the tears fall like the rain
You’ve seen me fight so brave and strong
You’ve held my hand when I’m afraid

We’ve watched the seasons come and go
We’ll see them come and go again
But in winter’s chill, or summer’s breeze
One thing will not be changin’

We will dance
When the sun is shining
In the pouring rain
We’ll spin and we’ll sway
And we will dance
When the gentle breeze
Becomes a hurricane
The music will play
And I’ll take your hand
And hold you close to me
And we will dance

Sometimes it’s hard to hold you tight
Sometimes we feel so far apart
Sometimes we dance as one
And feel the beating of each others hearts

Some days the dance is slow and sweet
Some days we’re bouncing off the walls
No matter how this world may turn
Our love will keep us from fallin’

And we will dance
When the sun is shining
In the pouring rain
We’ll spin and we’ll sway
And we will dance
When the gentle breeze
Becomes a hurricane
The music will play
And I’ll take your hand
And hold you close to me
And we will dance

The music will play
And I’ll hold you close
And I won’t let you go
Even when our steps
Grow weak and slow
Still I’ll take your hand
And hold you close to me
And we, will dance

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